In New York, we greet newcomers by giving them incorrect directions to Times Square
In Montreal, we welcome visitors – in particular tourists from France – with a weird look on their face when they ask for the underground city. Like if it was a real attraction…. it’s NOT. It’s just a way to avoid the cold and the snow in the winter so we don’t have to drive our ski-doo (we don’t use ski-doo in the city, this is another myth).
A two-bedroom house with a front yard and a back yard? Psh. What do you need all that space for?
In Montreal, we have plenty of places to hang out: parks, alleys, libraries, coffee shops, museums, and I could go on. Why the hell would you like a backyard? To avoid the kids to play together? Brillant.
I’m from New York. I don’t drive. I don’t know how to drive. I don’t know how to do something that teen-agers can do, and I’m proud of it.
I got my first driver’s license at the age of 24. It expired. I then passed a second time my driver’s license. I still have it. I did not take a seat on the driver’s side since a little over 4 years. That is how much a Montrealer I am. I walk. No matter if it’s hot or if there’s snow or ice, I walk E V E R Y W H E R E. If I feel for getting a little dose of germs, I’ll take the bus or the metro (subway).
You let people buy specific seats at this movie theater? What the hell is wrong with you? I’m from New York. I believe in a first-come, first-served free-for-all.
Ok, I didn’t know you could buy specific seats in a movie theater (the article refer to Los Angeles)! That’s wrong! You can’t do that! Part of the fun of going to the movie theater is actually not knowing if it will be full. No knowing if you’ll have to share your popcorn with a stranger rather than your partner.
I love reading The New Yorker and love the humor of the contributors. Yes, I also love New York very much.